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I Don't Want To Be Hugged!... Why The Autistic Child Has So Many Issues With The Sense of Touch! If there is one area that is an absolute heartbreaker for the parents of autistic children, surely this is it - the fact that an autistic child often won't even allow his parents to hug him, and will often, violently fight attempts by the parent to show affection to and/or comfort their child. Prior to taking Zachary off casein and gluten, when he awoke at night, it seemed there was nothing I could do to hold and comfort him. He fought me constantly ... and at times, the harder I tried to hold him, the harder he fought. I do believe diet is definitely a factor for many of these children and that the natural opiate (drug) effect of casein and gluten may indeed produce in these children hallucinations that are so vivid, so real, that the child perceives the "someone" trying to hold on to him may actually be an "extension" of that hallucination as opposed to a loving parent, causing great stress as the parent tries helplessly to hold his child in an attempt to comfort him. It is a well known fact that "drug trips" are not all "good trips" and hence, there is, in my opinion, reason to believe that this may be one issue at play when it comes to sensitivity to touch in the autistic child. Since digestive enzymes help to break down casein and gluten, perhaps this explains why Zachary's overall issues with touch have improved since I put him on these non-prescription supplements. I truly believe that by performing a digestive function the autistic child is unable to properly perform on his own, these enzymes help reduce the natural opiate effect of casein and gluten as well as helping in reducing the negative impacts of highly phenolic foods that also appear to be a problem for many of these children. For more on this as it relates specifically to Zachary, see More on Zachary's Diet and the Journal of Zachary's Progress. I strongly encourage all parents to look into a casein and gluten free diet and one low in phenols as well as into enzyme therapy for their children. For Zachary, these interventions have made a very significant difference. Although Zachary had made a great deal of progress on the casein and gluten free diet alone, I do believe his vision, auditory, and sensory issues as they relate to touch are all significantly improved since I added enzymes to his diet in February of 2002. With so much in autism, however, I am of the opinion that something else is also at play in issues related to touch and the autistic child. I say this because even with a casein and gluten free diet and enzymes, there are still issues with the sense of touch for many children, including Zachary. These "other issues", in my opinion, are also related to the autistic child's inability to properly process "the whole" without first understanding "the parts" that make up that "whole". In my opinion, if a child has difficulty perceiving the part from the whole, then the act of placing your hands on him or arms around him, by definition introduces a new "part" to his body... one his is unable to understand and cope with... one he is unable to separate in terms of "what belongs to him" verses "what belongs to you"... because once these "parts" touch and your hand or arm is on him, you, the parent, become "part of his whole"... something he may be unable to deal with and process properly. So what is the answer to this issue? It may be, again, as simple as the use of labels. Before placing your hand on your child, try holding your hand in the air and labeling it as "mommy's hand" or "daddy's hand". Then, slowly keep saying: "mommy's hand... as you gently place it on the child and say... "mommy's hand on...and say the child's name". Labeling "your hand" verses "his hand" and clearly emphasizing the distinction as "your hand" is placed on the autistic child may help tremendously with issues of touch in terms of helping the child define "what belongs to whom". I encourage all parents whose children have such issues to attempt this very very slowly in order to give the autistic child time to familiarize himself with "each person's hand parts" as they are joined through touch. The idea is to try to label absolutely everything for the child... your hand, your fingers, his hand, his fingers, etc.... as you join the two. It may also help to count out fingers as you do this. I showed Zachary the concept of "my hand" a long time ago... I'd count: 1 finger (as I held up one finger), 2 fingers (as I held up two fingers) and so on... all the way to 5 fingers. Once at 5 fingers, I'd say: 5 fingers = 1 hand and then, I'd wiggle all the fingers on my hand. To help with pointing, try counting the fingers as 1 finger = 1/5 of a hand, 2 fingers = 2/5 of a hand, 3 fingers = 3/5th of a hand, 4 fingers = 4/5th of a hand, 5 fingers = 5/5th of a hand... and ending with 5/5th = 1 hand. Before doing the fingers as fractions, try to get something similar to what I used in my "fraction" exercises to help the child understand the concept of the part verses the whole. Once the child can see "parts" or "fractions" as entities in and of themselves, I suspect this will greatly help with many many issues related to the sense of touch... and I pray it will help many parents to finally be able to hold their little ones... and to finally move up to that all precious label of "hugging". :o) Clearly defining the hand as an entity in and of itself, the pencil as an entity in and of itself, clothes as entities in and of themselves, etc., should help with issues of touch. I also encourage parents to look at my sections on Fractions and on Using Pencils for more on how to define the hand in terms of "parts to the whole". I found I had to give Zachary time to familiarize himself with anything new in life...everything from clothing to pencils to new foods. In my opinion, this "familiarization process" he always went through was simply his way of trying to make sense of new "parts" in his world... yet another coping mechanism used by the autistic child. This familiarization process was necessary because, in my opinion, if a child has difficulty perceiving the part from the whole, then the act of placing anything on the child himself, be that clothing, a pencil in his hand, etc., by definition, introduces a new "part" to his body... one his is unable to understand and cope with... one he is unable to separate in terms of "what belongs to him" verses "what is a separate entity" in and of itself... because once these "parts" (the pencil and the hand, the body and the clothes, etc.) touch, to the autistic child, they become a "whole" that needs to be understood in terms of its parts... and unless the "parts" are well defined, the autistic child, in my opinion, will experience frustration and distress as a result of his inability to properly perceive and cope with the parts that make up the whole. As with the overall issue of touch, in my opinion, the same overall issue of the inability to deal with "partiality" may also lie at the root of sensitivities to specific food textures. For example, in most autistic children, slimy foods are still very much an issue. Most autistic children, even those on enzymes, refuse to eat most slimy foods. Why is that? I thought about this one a lot... and again, in my opinion, it too can be somewhat explained by the issue of "partiality"... of "the part verses the whole". If you think about it, slimy foods do something no other foods do... they stick to the tongue and make it very difficult for the child to perceive "what is tongue" verses "what is food". The two get integrated into a "new whole" and this, I believe is the source of frustration for the child when it comes to slimy foods. This also explains why other types of foods (i.e., French fries, any crunchy foods, etc.) are better tolerated by the child... they are much more "discrete" when placed on the tongue... the child can still tell "what is tongue" and "what is food". Of course, there are always exceptions... and this is true of slimy foods too... those foods such as puddings, for example, foods the child quickly learns taste "good" are quickly labeled as "ok" even by the autistic brain and thus, the child can learn to overcome even certain "slimy foods" based on taste alone. I must admit this is still a difficult area for Zachary. I have spent virtually no time on this specific issue. Once things slow down, however, I will try to help him more in this area by labeling foods as "slimy" as "sticking to the tongue" when I give them to him to see if that works. Again, I suspect a label of "sticky" and the use of "sticks to your tongue" may help a lot in this area. The keys to resolving issues with touch as they relate to partiality, in my opinion, are again the same... labeling and other positive coping mechanisms, perhaps such as counting. |
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